I guess change is always happening. We only seem to notice the changes that we didn’t choose or the ones that affect the direction we hope our lives are going in. Some are better at riding the waves of change, while some of us sputter and resist it as if we can alter the reality that change will occur – whether we are ready for it or not. I guess it’s a lot like surfing. Those who love surfing know that their job is to simply balance and let the waves carry them forward. You’ve seen it, right? A wave that is just short of a tsunami with a lone surfer who moves skillfully on the board, adjusting their balance as they accommodate the power of the ocean.

And, then there are those of us who would lay plastered to the board, hanging on for dear life with hopes of getting through this experience so life can get back to normal. (Or, at least, get us back to the shore for a mai tai to calm our nerves…)

Either way, our surfers are changed – making ‘normal’ an elusive quest. I imagine our talented surfer would complete their ride energized through the knowledge that they became one with such a magnificent force of nature, while the novice might shut down…maybe just a little…from being so terrified that their future response would be avoidance. The experience changed them both.

I didn’t want my children to go to college. Oh, I did…but, I didn’t. I knew they needed to go as much for learning adult life skills as for the academics. Yet, it threw the balance of our home into chaos and I didn’t know if I could ride that wave and survive it with grace. I received a plant at a celebratory lunch prior to graduation at my daughter’s high school. It was an odd looking bulb plant with spiky leaves. New to gardening, I was confident I could grow anything. The leaves grew longer and longer over the summer months. I guess that’s okay, but it was boring. August came and it was time to take her to school – a mere thirteen hour drive from home. Did she know everything she needed to know for dorm life? Were her study skills adequate for a university curriculum? Would she be able to find her way safely around a new city? Was she ready for life away from parental influence? Okay, she was ready…but was I? She was like the first surfer – ready to move with the changes before her. I wanted to embrace the change, but found it intimidating and difficult.

The thing is, during our absence from home my plant had sent up a long stem which was full of flowers. When I saw it, it was as if I was being offered reassurance by God that she, too, will bloom – just let her grow into that which she was created to be. Change…

Ironically, ‘change’ is often wrapped up in a conversation that attempts to place God as the author of the change. Like, God causes the problem, the illness, the move, the conflict, the accident…well the list never ends…just so God can test us?  God, the same God that is described as, “kind and true, patient, and ruling all things in mercy,” (Wisdom of Solomon 15:1) will pick an occasion to cause us pain just to see if we somehow learn from it or pass some divine rite of passage? That doesn’t sound much like a kind, true, patient, merciful being!

When we see such a glaring inconsistency, we have to question our conventional ‘wisdom’ or understanding. My daughter – who, by the way did graduate from college with a degree in engineering – will frequently say, “correlation is not causation.” Maybe the belief that, “God is present in all situations” has morphed into the inconclusive hypothesis that, “If God is present in all situations, then God must cause all situations.” Our human rationalization for this leads us to the assumption that God wants to judge us through tests – or assaults – targeted toward disrupting our lives. Remember, “correlation is not causation.” Just because we can connect two dots doesn’t mean we have the full picture. Maybe our real test is not the situation causing us to have gut wrenching stress. Maybe it is to see God’s presence in and around and through the situation, redeeming it, not causing it, and to simply trust that God is.

Change. We can fight it or we can embrace it. Either way, it happens around us, through us and within us. The only thing we have control over is how we react to it. We can be energized or we can wither. We can live in worry or we can accept God’s assurance that God’s presence, grace and love is aways and everywhere in this amazing creation. Look for the blooms on the plant. You will find them!

There can be no keener revelation of a society’s soul than the way in which it treats its children.

– Nelson Mandela –

I remember the tears that came unexpectedly while sitting at my cousin’s wedding. No, it wasn’t the vows or the beautiful bride…although she certainly was beautiful! They came at a point in the ceremony that typically announces things are beginning, but doesn’t carry much weighty emotion. My cousin was simply ushering his mother,  my aunt, to her place of honor in the front row. She looked happy and beautiful. He looked like a typical groom – dapper in the rented tuxedo and a bit nervous. It was the song that broke me into a million pieces – You were the wind beneath my wings… Of course, I had seen the movie it came from (Beaches), and heard Bette Midler sing it many times on the radio. It was a song about friends, right??? Or was it…

I saw a mother and a son. Although, it could have been a father or a daughter or an entire family. I saw her pride as she looked at her little boy – all grown up. No doubt her thoughts were a composite of memories – his accomplishments, his pains, her fears, her hopes, his hopes, his dreams, her dreams…

The song said it all –

Did you ever know that you’re my hero?

You’re everything I wish I could be.

I could fly higher than an eagle,

’cause you are the wind beneath my wings.

We watched the movie Parental Guidance last weekend. The grandparents were coming to take care of the kids for a few days. The parents were worried that Grandma and Grandpa would ruin their children and their perfectly constructed lives if they said or did the wrong thing…which they did over and over again. Oh no, not intentionally! Rather, it was out of ignorance to the philosophy of raising children that the parents embraced – a philosophy that insidiously valued self over others.

Recent events in Kansas City resulted in teens being taken into custody because a community curfew was violated. Parents protested that the curfew was silly; that a movie theater was at fault because a movie time resulted in the children being out after the curfew; that traffic on the street  caused a mother to be late in picking up her daughter; and that the police profiled the kids for political reasons. No one took responsibility for the fact that the children (teens…) were in an area that had a curfew (for teens…) and they were out after the curfew. No one seemed to see how they could have avoided a problem by understanding the law, realizing it was for a good greater than their desires, and taking appropriate measures to live within the law. What they thought about the value of the law was not the question.

Back to Nelson Mandela. What does the way we treat our children say about our society?

Our faith calls us to live within the belief that we indeed love God above all things. When we truly embrace that belief, we cannot help but ooze gratitude for the abundance of God’s love for us. In turn, we then cannot help but to love God’s creation (our neighbor) as ourselves. After all, God not only created everything, God paused to see that all of it was “good”…everything…even the people we don’t like, brussel sprouts and mosquitoes.

So – how do we treat our children? What does it say about the soul of our society? Of course there is a balance here. Some children live in horrific conditions and that has to change. But what about the other children – the ones who have solid homes and families to guide them? What direction are they learning to look? Towards their own comfort? Or towards others with compassion? Are they taught to respect others rights and opinions – even when they seem different or odd? To share their time to help others? Even at home? Are they learning how to accept consequences for their actions and, even more importantly, how to think through a situation to avoid unwanted consequences?

As a society we must do the same.

Do we want our society’s soul to be a place where people care for others – where compassion and relationships are the norm and we all work for the common good? (Of course, there will be times when we have different views on the common good! Mr Mandela had a quote for that as well, “A good leader can engage in a debate frankly and thoroughly, knowing that at the end he and the other side must be closer, and thus emerge stronger. You don’t have that idea when you are arrogant, superficial and uninformed.”)  What do our children need to know to be responsible members of society and good leaders? Are the choices we make for them today leading toward that goal?

The wind beneath my wings? We need to teach our children to soar – to become all that they were created to be. But, as we do that, let us never forget Mr Mandela’s caution that the soul of our society will be a direct result of how we treat our children. The wind beneath them? It’s up to you.

I watched the movie Life of Pi last night. Basically, the film is about a young atheist who visits Pi to ponder the age old question, “How do you prove that God exists?” Pi, a professed Hindu/Catholic/Muslim, (!) becomes shipwrecked and survives for 227 days at sea. In his final dialogue, he cites two versions of his experiences, one with animals and one without. He is asked by those interviewing him which story is the true story. In actuality, neither account explains why the freighter he was initially on sank. The fact is – it sank and Pi’s ‘experiences’ do not support or negate that fact. Pi challenges them by saying, “So tell me, since it [his story] makes no factual difference to you and you can’t prove the question either way, which story do you prefer? Which is the better story, the story with animals or the story without animals?” The interviewers agree the story with animals in it is better. Pi responds, “And so it goes with God.”  Ultimately, Pi changes the question from that which the young man initially presented to, “Who do you say that God is?”

We frequently get caught up in the details of a story so much so that the real story can become lost. And, sometimes the meaning we take away from our stories focuses on the wrong thing. It’s like phonics – a word can sound completely different with a variety of pronunciations.  Yet, it happens in different dialects all the time. Does that change the meaning of the word? Typically not. Yet, we fuss and fret over the correct pronunciation when the tomato [long ‘a’] or tomato [short ‘a’] is right in front of us an appears as a red, shiny fruit. (Ummmm – vegetable???) You get my drift… Perception is the result of our reality, or worldview.

Our understanding of God is so much more convoluted than the tomato. Christians typically see God and Jesus as different characters. God takes the role as the hard-to-get-along-with-perfectionist of the Hebrew Bible, or  Old Testament. Jesus becomes the good-guy-we-can-all-hang-out-with-hero of the New Testament. Two pretty complex and different personalities! So, who do you say that God is?

We know that the Hebrew Bible was written through the lens, or worldview, of an ancient world that believed gods caused all things – good and bad. And, we put our human stamp on what we think a god should or should not do. Look at the horrors of the Hebrew Bible – David’s son died because of David’s sin. We extrapolate this as God’s punishment, even though we read that God forgave David! How does that work??? Yes, there are a plethora of examples pointing toward the wrath of God throughout these ancient works. Thank goodness Jesus came along to set God right! People were still asking why God caused ‘stuff’ happens when they hung out with Jesus.  Consider John 9 when the disciples tried to understand God’s ways and asked, “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?” Generation after generation, after generation shared the stories of a god who loves us…as long as we don’t cross him/her. Yet, Jesus was so different…he healed people! And he loved people. And, he didn’t see gender, race, socio-economics, disabilities, eye color or weight. (Okay, scripture doesn’t talk about eye color or weight…) Even people who didn’t deserve it!!! (So we think…)

I fully believe that Jesus came to set the record straight. And, I fully embrace that “God so loved the world that he sent his son…” [Jn 3:16]. But, what does that mean? Do we continue to look through the lens of the ancients that believed gods caused everything? Or do we look through the lens of Jesus and visualize that God loves? Do we accept the story of David that God forgives – even the unforgivable? Do we accept that sometimes life’s consequences are simply of our own making and we are still forgiven and loved in spite of all that we do…and don’t do?

Maybe Jesus, the incarnate God, came to us to change our worldview of who God is and who we are in God’s world. Maybe God has always been about love and acceptance. Maybe God just wants us to know that ‘stuff’ happens and there isn’t anywhere or anything or anyone who isn’t in God’s loving presence. Maybe life is simply that – life. And maybe God wants us to know that his/her love is always present to give us hope – even when you are in the middle of the Pacific Ocean on a life boat with a tiger and no food and in a storm. (Remember Pi?)

I recently read a quote that said, “God doesn’t really care what you do; God cares why you do it.” Who do you say that God is? How you answer that will determine what you do and why you do it. Maybe that’s Jesus’s example and message to us.

My best guess? I like the story with the animals.

So, it seems this blog-thing is up and running…sort of. My technological skills are slowly improving and I think this may actually work (other than the fact that I sent the invitation to visit my blog before actually writing one…LEARNING CURVE!)

I have chosen to call this blog “Sophia Meditations” for obvious reasons. And, in view of that, I have selected a picture taken on Easter morning near the Makapuu lighthouse on Oah’u Hawai’i. We had the fantastic opportunity to hike the trail and watch the sun come up on Easter. Now, least you think we really got up THAT early, keep in mind that Hawai’i is 5 hours behind central daylight time. We actually slept in AND got to see the amazing sunrise. It was incredible to walk the trail in the dark. There was a reverence to it with quiet, almost whispered, voices. You could feel the anticipation as a trickle of light moved over the still waters. Then, the sun (Son???) in it’s brilliance broke through the darkness in full glory. Trust me, I wish we had brought bread and wine up there instead of donuts and coffee. But, sometimes we need to adapt what’s available to the situation…right???

God is present in all that is. Take time today to recognize his/her presence. Walk hand in hand with the One who loves you unconditionally and who offers unlimited joy.