Monthly Archives: March 2014

The death of a man…

22 Saturday Mar 2014

Posted by in choices, compassion, hate, human nature, Lenten Meditaion, love, spirituality, Uncategorized

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I clearly recall the day I saw the gathering on the sidewalk. Several police officers were stationed on the opposite side of the street watching the men, women and children who held pickets splattered with messages depicting a belief that it is somehow God’s will for anyone who doesn’t fit within a narrow spectrum of behavior to die a horrible and painful death. Furthermore, if we show any love or compassion for their targeted population, we should share the same vengeful fate. Additionally, our national acceptance of all people is in jeopardy as proven when our military men and women die while defending, amongst other things, our right to speak as viciously as this famous group of people who erroneously call themselves a ‘church’, ‘believers in God’, and, I choke on the word, ‘Christians’.

It was all I could do to keep from driving onto the walkway to permanently silence them. How could they infect children with this distorted perception of God and how God feels about humanity? Children are born beautifully open to people of all colors, religions, sexual orientations, ethnicities, and abilities. They can only enter the box of prejudice with instruction from the adults they look up to. This group of adults damages the innocence of their children as they attacked people unknown to them, an attack generated simply because they did not share the group’s distorted religious beliefs. The day I saw them, they stood in front of a building that served Jewish believers on Saturday and offered Christian services on Sunday. It wasn’t their traditional venue of tormenting grieving families at military funerals; yet, it exemplified their perverted position that God sees life the way they see it.

Then it happened. Their patriarch and church founder died. His passing has permeated not only the news, but also clutters social media sites and seems to be the topic of choice for many, like myself, who write or preach about spiritual matters. I didn’t intend to write about his passing. But, it has been gnawing at me. The thing is, I like to think I’m not writing about his life; rather I am meditating on how his life has affected our society. The only significance I find in his life and death is in the overall goodness of society and the pervasive attitude that we must never stoop to his level of hate. News reports and social media comments share a general message of compassion for his family as they mourn their loss. A few have threatened to picket his funeral just as he did to others. But, each of these remarks have been met with reminders of a loving God and encouragement to show the family compassion. Even the church I mentioned above had a message in their signage asking for peace as he enters eternity.

What I see in all of this is God’s hand. God was in the crowds who created barriers at gravesides to protect grieving families from their venom. God is present in the goodness and peaceful wishes extended to his family as they grieve. God is in every heart that weeps for this man and the life he lived never knowing the love and grace God extends to all. God himself (herself?) probably weeps with intense sadness that this man, God’s beloved, never knew the joy God showered around him throughout his life. He only knew the deity of hate he created in his mind to support his fears and prejudices about people who were not like him.

The problem is, this man is not totally unlike us. His example is of a life lived without compassion. Yet, we have the potential to live in his world when it is convenient for us. We claim we would never teach a child to hate, but what are we doing to teach them to love? What do we teach them when we are angry with someone and rant about that person’s less desirable characteristics? What if those attributes include an ethnicity, gender, sexual orientation, or disabilities that the child transfers to all people with those traits? Further, we think we would never stand in the midst of another’s grief and shout scathing epitaphs about their loved one deserving to die. Yet, we might find ourselves unwilling to forgive someone who has wronged us and secretly hope they experience pain.

I like to think I live out of compassion for all of God’s creation. Yet, I am sure there are times when God shakes his (her) head at my choices. My prayer is that as I continue to navigate this crazy thing called “life”, I grow increasingly aware of God’s love and presence in all things…so aware that I have no choice but to make the right choice.

As for you Mr. Phelps, I believe in the power of God’s love. It is because of that belief, I pray you will rest in peace, finally knowing yourself as God’s beloved, fully aware of the pain your hate rendered and equally conscience of the incredible mercy God shared with you when God called you home.

Epilogue: The family of the man picketed again last night. On the other side of the street was a group of people with a single banner that read, “We are sorry for your loss.” Some hear God’s gentle nudge to meet hate with compassion and some are deafened by the noise of their own prejudice. Most of us fall somewhere in between…

Words, labels and understanding Sabbath rest…

16 Sunday Mar 2014

Posted by in compassion, Lenten Meditaion, meditation, Sabbath, spirituality, Uncategorized

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UnknownWords matter. Really – they do. The words we choose tell a story far beyond the simple sentences we put them in. For example, the word ‘storm’ seems pretty straightforward. Who doesn’t know what a storm is? The general definition is a disturbance in the atmosphere. We typically think of wind and rain, maybe some lightening and thunder. It could include some hail, but basically, a storm is a storm…right? So, what if that storm is a winter storm? Yes, precipitation is still a factor, but scratch the hail, lightening and thunder. Okay, sometimes we have thunder snow, which means lightening and thunder happen with the snow. Then there are sand storms – if you live in a desert. You get the point. The understanding of the word ‘storm’ can be relative, depending on the general conditions and time of year in the given area.

“Bible” is the same way. We have the canon, which is one thing if you are Protestant and another thing if you are Catholic. We have numerous translations of the original text and only pieces of those initial manuscripts. Then, there is the whole discussion about who wrote it and how it was written. Like, did God guide the hand of the writers or did the writers attempt to write about the place where their lives rubbed up against influence from the Divine? Is it history or is it a compilation of stories to tell us something about who God is and who we are in God’s world?

Then, there is the whole God-thing. Who is God? Is he a judgmental ruler who watches and waits until we mess up so he can pounce on us with consequences? Or is God the essence of all goodness that longs for us to move in rhythm with him (or her…) throughout time?

I attended a study last week where several questions came up about the Sabbath and what it should mean to us in our 21st-century lives. I maintain that how one answers, “What is the Bible?” and “Who is God” will determine how one recognizes the Sabbath…as well as how one responds to most of the issues encountered in this crazy thing called “life”. Let’s look at this more fully.

In Mark 23, Jesus is found talking to the Pharisees. The discussion focuses on the Sabbath and what a person can do to please God – like, what does it mean to ‘keep the Sabbath’. Understand they had lists of rules that were designed to help people do what they perceived was right. Jesus used an example where King David broke not only Sabbath law, but also Levitical law when he and his soldiers were “hungry and in need of food”. They went into the temple on the Sabbath and ate bread that was reserved for the priests. Verse 27 states, “Then he said to them, ‘The Sabbath was made for humankind, and not humankind for the Sabbath.'”

Aside from the obvious discussion of Christ’s statement about the Sabbath, the questions arose, “Why was the bread only for the priests?” and “It sounds like they were starving (in need of food), so what were they supposed to do?” In reality, was the bread only for the priests because it was so holy that only seemingly holy men could eat it? Or was it only for the priests because it assured their daily sustenance? If we fast-forward to today, would we deny a starving person bread that had been blessed for the Eucharist if that was the only food available? Or would we feed them out of compassion and worry about replacing the ‘holy’ food later?

You see, how we define the Bible and God will affect how one responds to this dilemma.

I believe the Bible is holy and a set of writings by humanity throughout time attempting to let others know what a relationship with God looks like. However, what made perfect sense to the writer(s) of Torah becomes muddy as we read their script today. We can recite the words, but the essence of those words become complicated as we attempt to understand the culture and tradition within which they were written. Yet, we say the Bible is timeless and written for all generations, including now and those to come. Maybe there is something we are missing in the interpretation. I for one have certainly broken several laws that were important to the ancients. There are things in scripture about gold earrings and braids that our religious culture doesn’t deem important anymore. However, don’t even get me started on passages about slavery and the right way to treat a slave! To condone human ownership, let alone attempt to claim it is Biblical is cause for me to break a few more of the ancient rules…the silence of women being a trivial start.

The point is, to embrace scripture and what it says to us today must be something other than literal interpretation. If the intent is to let others throughout time know what a relationship with God looks like, then the importance has to be in understanding who God is.

That’s where Jesus comes in. If we believe, as the ancient writers told us, that Jesus is God in human form, then to understand the words and actions of Jesus is to get an idea of what our relationship with God should look like. Jesus loved people…all kinds of people. His list of friends included crazy people, tax collectors, fishermen, shepherds, women, wealthy, poor, widows, children, prostitutes, Romans, gentiles…have I missed anyone? The point is, Jesus found beauty and acceptance in everyone.

In her book, “The Friendship of Women”, Joan Chittister, a Benedictine nun, stated, “…once we are loved we have an obligation to live as best we can.” (p. XIII)

To put this in perspective, think of the woman who was to be stoned for adultery. (John 8:1-11) Jesus told her to go and sin no more. My guess is, she was so grateful for his compassion that she did exactly what he said. I suppose this is where we could go on another tangent about what exactly we mean when we use the word “sin”. Suffice it to say, I have to believe she went back to her life and lived out the tenderness that had been offered to her. She was loved by Him and responded to that love by sharing compassion with others.

That brings us back to the Sabbath. What does it mean to keep the Sabbath and how do we respond to the part where scripture informs us we will loose our friends and die if we don’t. (Exodus 31:1-15) We tend to ignore that part when Sunday rolls around. No, we don’t have to worry about our community stoning us if we prepare a meal on Sunday or walk more than 500 steps. But, we have also moved pretty far away from understanding why God insisted we recognize the Sabbath.

You see, we are created in God’s image. (Genesis 1:27) God wildly created for six periods of time, referred to as ‘days’ in the ancient writings. I have visions of a sculptor that chisels and taps in a frenzy of creative activity allowing little time for rest, food or friends until he stands back to say, “It is good” and sits down to enjoy his work, maybe with a cup of tea and a biscuit. Maybe he calls out to a friend or two to come and see what he’s done, pours tea into their cups and pulls out the canister of biscuits along with some cheese to augment their time together. They talk and laugh, sharing the moment. Then, after they all go home, the artist decides to lie in his hammock with a comfy quilt and rest. The next day, when he is feeling restored, he walks amongst his friends and enjoys their company; he nurtures them when they are enduring troubles, he laughs with them when they are amused and even pops out a miracle or several like turning water into wine.

You see, God knows how important it is for us to rest, to take time to restore our souls and to nurture our relationships…for without these things we will surely die. Because we are human and cannot understand all of God’s ways, we have made the Sabbath into a day complete with laws that define what rest should look like. Jesus reminded us that life happens, even on the Sabbath. Someone gets hungry…someone needs healing…someone needs our love and compassion.

You see, to believe that God needs us to focus on adoration for God and nothing else for an entire day every week is to ignore God’s love for all of creation. On the flip side, to ignore our need for rest is to forget who created us. It can get pretty tricky if we try to put Sabbath in a box of legalisms.

What if we took to heart that God longs for us to be whole and looked at Sabbath rest as our opportunity to restore the things that make us whole – things like loving God with all of our hearts, souls, strength and minds and loving our neighbors as ourselves? (Matthew, Mark and Luke as well as numerous other references) What if we spent time in daily conversations with God – whether we call that worship, prayer or meditation – and what if we did the things that nurtured God’s creation out of the love we experience  as a result of the love God lavishes on us? What if that’s what Sabbath rest is supposed to look like?

Maybe it’s just easier to call it a day…

Puppy collars, Jiminy Cricket and Choices…

06 Thursday Mar 2014

Posted by in choices, compassion, love

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IMG_0383Lucy, the puppy-girl, has a new training program. I resisted it until I fully realized that her behavior was preventing us from having friends visit us in our home. No one likes to be jumped on by a 50-pound dog! Additionally, I have replaced a rug and reupholstered a chair because Lucy likes to chew. I tried to justify these purchases by saying the chair and rug were old and needed to go away. But, the fact remained that my dog was running the household and our lives. She supposedly passed Puppy Training 1001 three times. I have the certificates to prove it! Although, each class had the philosophy that everyone gets a trophy on the last day, which offered no guarantee that important lessons were learned. Lucy was potty trained and could heel when we took her on take long, happy walks. But, her behavior at home wasn’t acceptable and didn’t seem to be getting any better. One trainer told us to ignore bad behavior and reward her when she did something good. I ran out of treats and she continued to terrorize our furniture and friends. Another trainer informed me Lucy saw herself as the alpha-dog and I simply wasn’t dominant enough. True! My natural style is to live and let live. Lucy spent much of her time in a crate and I crept around the house hoping she would think she was home alone making nap time her primary activity. My occasional tantrum did nothing to teach her proper manners. My arm remained her favorite chew-toy and my patience was thin.

The new program uses a small device that attaches to her collar. When I push a button, she gets a gentle reminder that what she is doing is unacceptable. I avoided this type of a system until I had the opportunity to hold a collar in my hand and feel the vibration she would experience when given a correction. It is gentle, as if someone is rapidly tapping her on the shoulder and encouraging her to focus on right behavior.

It reminds me of Pinocchio’s conscience, Jiminy Cricket. Pinocchio’s goal in life was to become a ‘real boy’ instead of a talking puppet. Yet, his world was full of seductive temptations and stumbling blocks designed to divert him from the right choices. Jiminy Cricket would jump in and tap him on the shoulder in an attempt to get his attention away from those things that prevented him from living the life he so longed for.

If I have a choice, I would prefer the persistent tap of Jiminy Cricket on my shoulder to the gentle reminder from Lucy’s collar. Suffice it to say, I could certainly use either. Maybe we all could. We are surrounded with an infinite number of choices. Some make little difference – like whether to have a latte or cappuccino. Who cares? It’s probably a more important choice to have skim milk over whole milk floating on my espresso, but there are those who would argue that point as well. I have a fairly strong opinion about the foods I eat and how they are produced. I want my chickens to have had the opportunity to live like a chicken was created to live. You know, pecking and scratching instead of existing in a cage so small there is no place to move around and stuffed so full of hormones that they grow at an unnatural rate. I want real fruits and vegetables, preferably organic to protect not only my health, but as a means to keep pesticides and herbicides out of the ground waters. These are choices about health and ecology.

But, there are the other choices that are important in another way. What difference does it make if I flip off the driver who sped up so I couldn’t get into the lane I needed? Worse yet, what if I am that driver who thinks I own the road? Those kinds of choices get to the heart of who I think I am and how I expect others to respond to me. In reality they are choices about compassion and where I see my place in humanity. Yes, driving manners seem to be low-level behaviors, but they certainly speak to responses that can ooze out of a person when it appears no one is looking.

Finally, there are the really big choices that we all hesitate to talk about except to our very best friends who are sworn to secrecy and will keep the promise of confidentiality because of where you have both been with each other over the years. These are the things that can be life altering – sometimes in a good way, and sometimes not.

By this time you get the point. Our choices come from so many places. They can come from past pains or joys; from intellectual parameters or creativity; from our experiences or our dreams; from our fears, our perceived inadequacies, or crazy attitudes about life and what it is supposed to offer to us and those around us. Ultimately, our choices can be jaded by responses to life’s experiences and opportunities or augmented by joys and successes. I guess it’s fair to say there is also a point in life when we could use a correction collar like Lucy’s or a nagging conscience like Pinocchio’s Jiminy Cricket…something to keep us on course when our options magnificently pull us away from all that is right and true and good.

The thing is, we have been given a barometer to weigh our choices against. The trendy expression “What would Jesus do?” frequently comes up in conversations about right choices. To fully appreciate this statement, one has to dig behind it to define how Jesus made his decisions. He didn’t have a laundry list of religious legalisms. Of course, he was Jewish and there was the Torah and all of the laws contained therein which spoke to human interactions and relationships.  Yet, he followed the preeminent theme of love and compassion even when his choice collided with the common interpretations of Torah as defined by his culture. Basically, his life taught us that when all else fails, try love and compassion. Actually, try them first so all else doesn’t need to fail!

I still want the nudge when society’s alluring message of what’s important rubs up against what love and compassion would have me do and I start leaning the wrong way. I will make mistakes, I will have successes and, ultimately, I will need a whole lot of forgiveness for those times when I really want to be right but am decidedly wrong.

Lucy’s collar is instrumental in teaching her manners and Pinocchio became a real boy. I am hopeful that when I remember to wear love and compassion as my correction collar or accept them as the nagging cricket on my shoulder, my choices will be the right ones.